So I had a recent meltdown.
Not to get overly detailed or to be whiny, but I had one of those days when I started question whether all this work (meaning working on my health) worth it, I started to question if I am doing enough, felt like a failure, worthless and so on. When my partner hugged me and told me he has never seen me working so hard and all steps matter, instead of appreciating his encouragement, my automatic response was a ‘No, I am not doing anything and I am a failure for life.’-type of something….
But that wasn’t right of me. I do appreciate his support and encouragement. (And I love him.) And he is right. Small steps do matter. Also, if I am honest to myself – and shut off the stupid negative self-talk! -, I am, in fact, working very hard on my health and happiness. Could I or should I do more? Maybe. But probably not. Glancing at it objectively, I am going at a pace that is just right, fighting my challenges each day, adding new ones daily, and in a small, settle way I am learning – thus improving – each day.
But meltdowns and self-doubt happens. It happens to everyone – maybe with some it happens less than with others, but I think it would be too superhuman-like of someone feeling perfectly confident each second of his or her life. (If you are in fact that always happy-confident-perfect superhuman, please, remain silent!)
So how do we deal with meltdown, self-doubt, negative self-talk, sadness, or the ‘feeling of giving up’? I came up with a list that I find really helpful and a good reminder for myself that I hope everyone can use in their toolbox to fight their demons. Here are some amazing ways to feel better, to live better, to keep things in perspective, to get motivated, and to feel happy.
15 + 1 Way to Feel Better (and to Live better)!
- Remember, small steps matter. Don’t try to do everything at once. You will get there. If I gave up on the first lap of every 10,000 meter race I ran, because it was ‘hard’ or the ‘weather was shit’ or I didn’t believe I was ‘as good as my competitors’, I would’ve never win a race, would’ve never get a PR. Some goes for anything. One salad, one journal entry, one hug at a time.
- Follow you plan, no matter what! Just because you got out of bed on the wrong foot, forgot your first health routine, was late for work, have a headache, or whatnot, it doesn’t mean you have to throw everything out the window. Stick to your plan as much as possible, you will feel better about it in the end of the day.
- You are worthy and deserving! Really you are. Everyone deserves happiness, health, and love. Would you argue with that?! I thought so. So if everyone deserves happiness, health, and love, why would you be an exception? You are not that special to be the only one not to deserve all this goodness. So please, believe me, you are worthy and deserve of happiness, health, love, and much more!
- Look for inspiration. Inspiration is important to help us get focused, motivated, and excited. Look for inspirational documentaries or re-watch you favorite ones (Food Matter or The Secret?). Read articles or books on inspiring people (Eat and Run makes me want to run an ultramarathon like now!). Listen to a motivational speaker (Tony Robbins, anyone?!). Go on Pinterest. Just simply google “inspirational quotes”, you will find plenty to reflect on!
- Get out and move. Nothing makes me so relaxed and puts life into perspective as a good long run does. Really, there is nothing that running can’t cure (or at least relieve temporarily). Perhaps for you it is not running but kickboxing, basketball, jumping on the trampoline, or going for a walk. Just get moving!
- Nourish your body and your mind. I a nice nourishing meal may just give you some needed energy and a new positive perspective. How about a green juice? A warm veggie soup? A salad? A superfood-filled bowl of granola? Or some raw vegan chocolate? And if you are at it, nourish your soul too. Give yourself a hug. Read. Listen to music. Take a bath. Relax. Do it. Now.
- Don’t go into extremes. Things are not only black and white but shades of color. Maybe you made a mistake. It doesn’t mean you are a failure. Maybe you didn’t stick to your diet today perfectly, skipped your workout or forgot about those darn affirmations. But guess what? Nobody is perfect. Accept set-backs and move the f*ck on. You will live.
- Celebrate daily magic. Okay, seeing magic and counting blessing sounds a bit to religious/spiritual and just plain weird to me. But, do see the good in daily life. Maybe it was an incredibly terrible day, but how about the sunshine, the fresh piece of fruit for breakfast, or the cute kitten picture your friend posted on Facebook. Do notice and smile for the little things.
- Find your affirmation and your mantra. Affirmations and mantras are important tools to better our daily lives, to feel positive, and to realize our dreams. Think about what you want to be, make it a positive statement in the present tense and tell yourself as an affirmation. (e.g. “I am beautiful.”, “I am an environmentally conscious, kind vegan.”, “I choose to be happy.”). Make it into a small verse and ‘sing it’ to yourself as a mantra.
- Make an intention. If you even half-way into the idea that you can create your own life and your own reality, then you need to make intentions. You can start your day with one or in case ‘everything goes wrong’, re-start you day with a new intention. Take a deep breath, count to ten and make your intention. It can be simple and broad like “I intent to feel happy today.”. You can write it down, write it on your hand, and remind yourself throughout the day.
- Dream. And dream big. Make a list of goals. Create a vision board (or a new vision board!) and hang it above your desk. Make a ‘mini vision board’ that fits in your wallet. Write a journal entry on describing your perfect day, your perfect life, your wildest dreams and goals. Visualize them. Smile when you thinking about them – you may just manifest them to come true!
- Journal. One of the best ways to release emotions and to reflect is to journal. Don’t be afraid, it is personal, nobody will see it. Write about your day, write about your goals, write about your dreams, free write or look up some journaling exercises. It may just help you to get to know yourself better, to find new motivation or to even find the meaning of life.
- Make list of 10s. This can be a form of a journaling exercise that can help to see the beauty in life, or to help you get focused on your goals, or to find your passion, or (the list goes on). Make a list of 10 what you appreciate about life, a list of 10 what you love about yourself, a list of 10 why is a certain goal important for you (e.g. 10 reasons to go vegan).There are infinite possibilities of list of 10s. But you can always make it a list of 20 or 50 or a 100. It gets really difficult past 50!
- Get support. Talk to a friend. Talk to a family member. Join a club to belong to. Go down to the closest juice bar (or bar…) for a chat. Find an online forum. Communicate with fellow bloggers. Talk to me. Seriously, message me if you need a listening ear or supporting words! I am not joking either!
- Accept yourself. Accept all your positive qualities. But accept all the things you need to work on. Accept where you are at so you can move forward. I travel a lot, thus I accept that today I may be in Greece, but when I get on the train, I will make it to Croatia, and then maybe to Germany, and who knows where else. So accept where you are as a starting point, start dreaming, and embrace your journey.
+ 1. Smile. Yes, no matter how hard things get, take a deep breath and smile. Practice smiling and eventually it comes easier. Apparently if you smile, even if you fake it at first, after a while it will feel natural, real, and you will feel happy. Sometimes in the morning I write it on my hand ‘smile now’, and whenever I see it, I smile instantly. Let me tell you, a smile can make a difference.
Have a lovely day!!!